It’s been a while, about a year and a half actually. I don’t miss sex so much, not anymore, I miss love. I don’t miss it all the time, just sometimes like tonight when I’m a bit tired and I’m climbing into bed alone. I miss that moment when your other half climbs in next to you and you both lie down and your skin touches. I miss putting my head on someone’s chest and feeling the warmth of a mans body next to me. I miss spooning, having someone’s arm wrapped around your body. And I miss feeling loved, by a man. It passes, but sometimes I wonder if I will ever feel these things again and if I do, how long will it last this time.
Recently I had another tattoo. I fell in love with it when one of my best friends daughters shared it on Instagram (she’s a quite brilliant artist and tattoo apprentice) and I knew I had to have it! Since having it I have been surprised by the questions people have asked about it, it is a constant shock to me that people seem to assume that it doesn’t mean anything to me in particular, and that it’s just a “nice picture”, how presumptuous- and quite wrong!
When a complete stranger says “I like your tattoo, what is it?” I don’t mind so much- I mean why should they know what it’s regarding to, or symbolic of? But when someone (who spends a lot of time with me) recently said “what is that? And didn’t you want something that meant more to you personally?” I was astonished! I mean, firstly; you obviously don’t know me at all and secondly; what makes you think it’s not?
Alice was a girl who, through her curiosity and naivety, was thrown into a world where nothing made sense and she was completely alone. She had to challenge the beliefs that she had grown up with to find herself. She had to make friends with people who challenged the norm, and learn her strengths to carve her own path. She had to take a leap of faith and trust in her instincts. She learnt about herself, and others. She bettered herself and discovered that great things can come from adversity. She found her strengths and became someone that was able to open her eyes to the endless possibilities that were right in front of her. No Prince Charming, no rose tinted glasses -just pure courage and determination.
So, pretty picture it might be; self indulgence it may have a slither of; but insignificant it most certainly is not.
No make up tonight.
When the love of your life isn’t ready to do what it takes. When you have given all that you can give, and more. When you ache from the pain of missing them. When your soul echoes because half of it is missing. The person who you told all there was to know. The person who you find it hard to breathe without. The person who’s touch makes you gasp. The person that you know you will never replace. When that person let’s you down. When they become something that you never thought they would be. When they give up on themselves. When they allow your love to fade. When they take, and take until there’s nothing left. When taking your ring off makes your heart stop beating. When saying their name makes your eyes fill will tears that you struggle to contain. When you know it’s right but it feels
So wrong and when no one understands. When everything you ever thought you believed is challenged and when you Simply aren’t enough. Grief without physical death. Pain without physical harm. And yet you carry on. Not with expectation. Just carry on, knowing that one day it may become easier, or maybe it will not. When the love of your life isn’t ready to be the love of
I’m a full on lipstick girl, even in summer really. I’m not really into the barely there lip, unless I’m on the beach and even then it’s a rare moment!
I normally have no massive issues with dry or chapped lips but when they get dry they really do get dry and I get those big hard bits that are difficult to shift! Anyway, this blog isn’t about curing chapped lips, it’s just a little piece to say; as hard as it is for some of us, NEVER wear lipstick when your lips are in bad nick! It looks terrible, even worse when your lipstick is more matt than gloss (like a lot of mine)!
Use your lip balm (my favourite is Dior rose plumping lip balm which is not only brilliant but comes in a gorgeous little (ceramic looking) pot for your bag) as lipstick and if, like me, you simply can’t function without your lippy then compromise and bring out a lipgloss (No beach required!) .
(And…keep an eye on when you get them- I have a lipstick that makes my lips really bad if I use it!!! It could just be a certain brand or ingredient.)
Anyway, here’s to happy lipstick days and the occasional balmy gloss day too!